He said, He said

The boys are upstairs playing in their rooms.  Together, happily!  I'm [insert random household chore here] downstairs.

Suddenly, the giggling from upstairs stops.  An unnatural calm settles around the house, like that moment before a storm cloud breaks open with a thunderous boom.  The house is holding its breath.  Then, the ear-splitting wail of a three year old comes bouncing off the tile floors and every other hard surface in the house.  As the first echoes are fading, a second shriek, from the Bean, comes ricocheting through the house.

This is a common occurence in my house.  I put down the [insert cleaning tool here], and head off to investigate.  I am greeted at the top of the stairs by two tear-streaked, anxious faces.

Me: "What's going on?"
Bean: "Mom," he sucks in a big breath, purses his lips slightly, and closes his eyes briefly.  If he knew what the Serenity Prayer was, I'm pretty sure he'd be saying it in his head right now. God grant me the serenity...  "Mom," he begins again, "we was goofing around and both got hurt."  He shakes his head slowly, It's really such a shame how these things happen sometimes, isn't it?

I can feel my eyebrows creeping up my forehead, but I'm powerless to keep the expression of incredulity off my face.

"No we was not!  I was not goofin' off!"  The Little One is indignant.  "He tried to take my [most-important-toy-ever-today] an' I hit him an' he hit me back an' made myself fall down."

So, this is what I've learned:  The Bean has reached an age where he's weighing how much trouble he'll get in if he admits guilt.  But he's smart.  He doesn't lie to me outright.  He does try that sometimes, but he's so obvious when he's lying to me that it backfires on him every time.  We've had many, many, many, many discussions about how lying will only get you in more trouble in the long run, the boy-who-cried-wolf syndrome, etc....  But he's four.  I'm sure he remembers these conversations for approximately three seconds after we finish them.  (But if you swear in front of a four year old, they'll remember and repeat that FOREVER. In front of your parents. In church.)  Instead, he has started distorting the events just slightly - everything sounds accidental and all in good fun in his version.

The Little One hasn't figured out how to lie to me yet, or to distort the truth, as his brother does.  He just busts out with whatever, including incriminating himself when that's the truth.  In his mind, his retaliation, or even provocation, is thoroughly justified, so I'm not sure he even thinks he has something to hide in the first place!

Heaven help me when they learn to work together and start polishing their stories before they tell me what's happening.